November 12, 2011

• Dealing With Anger

  I meant to share this story with my Mom yesterday while we made my nephew Clayton’s first birthday cake. My Mom @shellisland wrote how my family and those who love my Aunt are all “tilted” at the news of her cancer. Processing all of the emotions is hard sometimes.

  I’m the eternal optimist and despite my book smarts, I refuse to believe in my heart that things are as bad as they appear. I choose to believe that everything will turn out just fine. I’m still not exempt from feeling frustrated and angry that my precious Aunt has to endure any of this.

  I was talking to my cousin Sarah about my Aunt this past Sunday night. She said she often feels really angry about it all. I told her I did, too. I shared with her how I dealt with my anger. Seriously, in cases like this when you feel completely livid and on fire, who do you get angry with? I once was angry with God. It took a long, long time for me to get right with God again. I’ve come to the conclusion that God is indeed a good God and I know that while I don’t understand His purpose, why He allows some things to happen, that there is no point in being angry with God.

  The other day my Mom and I were texting. I don’t have the texts anymore, but it went something like this:

  Mom: Did you know they are cloning a wooly mammoth?

  Me: Whaaat? Who? I have major problems with that.

  Mom: Japan or China, it’s on the news.

  Mom: Me too, they could be using all of that money to cure cancer.

  So now, when I’m mad, I choose to be mad at the people smart enough and the people with enough money to clone an extinct creature, when they could use their brains and money to cure cancer. I know it sounds stupid and all too easy, but for me it works. It feels better than turning my back on God. I don’t stay angry for long periods of time now. If I ever met one of the scientists or financial backers working on the project, I would give them a swift kick in the butt, though.

  Love to all.

  • 11:14 am
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