June 7, 2010

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  Day 27 — The last thing that made you cry.

  My precious girl burned her hand on my curling iron. We weren't at home and I was a little out of my element. I always have cords up high and am really safe when it comes to hot curling irons and clothes irons. Anyhow, I don't know if Mattie pulled the cord and got the iron in the floor or if Caden moved it, but she picked the hot end up and burnt her baby hand all to hell. That night when she was just inconsolable made me cry. I didn't bawl because I didn't want to upset her more, but I sure wanted to.

  
  Day 28 — Say something to your 15 year old self.

  Look Whitney, I know you think you've got everything figured out. And you do have a pretty good handle on things. But you don't know EVERYTHING, you're 30 and you still don't. You have no concept of the stress your Dad is under at work right now. He's going through hell and back to put food on the table and a nice roof over your head. And you simply can't take the things he says or doesn't say, does or doesn't do to heart. He isn't as self-centered as you think, because everyday that he goes to that hell-hole he works at, he goes for you. So stop being so materialistic. Your incessant want for things you simply can't have is a blow to his ego. Shut the hell up about new cars and be damn grateful for whatever you're driving. Keep talking to him and don't bring up things you want, or your he's not going to listen. If you're not careful one of these days, he'll stop listening because of it. There will be times in the next few years that you'll really want to talk to him, need to talk to him, and he's not going to listen because YOU'VE worn.him.out.

  Just do the things Dad asks you to do. He's a ridiculous micromanager, he's not trying to steal the independence you crave so badly. He doesn't not trust you to do things, he is just a micromanager. He can't help it. So don't get so angry when he wants you to do everything little thing HIS way, suck it up. Please don't argue with him.

  I don't know what to tell you, but to be nice. You are going to be incredibly tempted to mirror his attitude and stubbornness, but if you do you're going to destroy the great father-daughter relationship you've enjoyed so much.  That tenderness will only be a childhood memory. Just because he doesn't hug you anymore, doesn't mean you should stop hugging him. It's. not. his. fault. He's entirely blinded by stresses of the world that he can't see what he's doing, so you should just shower him with love and appreciation and respect...even though he wont always show you the same love, appreciation, and respect. Otherwise, your going to feel deep sorrow for your part in the next few years of turmoil. Take my advice, because if you don't, you'll be every bit as guilty as he is for the demise of your relationship. It will never, ever be the same. You will hurt each other and 15 years later, it will still make you sad.

  • 4:51 pm
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